SCRIBBLED THOUGHTS OF A MAD GENIUS

My friends are a harem of carefully selected ideal beautiful creatures. Sometimes when I observe all the friends around me, I get the feeling that they are all projections of aspects of myself that I have acquainted myself with and ‘been’ and drawn out as reflexions and manifested in tangible form. Do we know what we are collectively? No. We have no sense of universal identity, we have no sense of solidarity and purpose as a community of conscious animals. If we can come to an awareness of ourselves, we will be empowered in a very tangible, intense way.

So many broken wings and bleeding voices and screaming bones and shattered souls. I can usually hear them if they’re around. The demons get stuck inside me, in my flesh and bones. Some places are calm and peaceful and still without memory of pain. I like those places, I like those places very much. I wish all the places were peaceful and unbroken. All the stars in the sky reflect the points of light in our souls that we cannot see when we look into the mirror.

How would anyone remember who I am when I am always changing the skin that I wear? The moon and stars are made of blood.

I think that ‘suffering is life’ and without suffering there is no beauty or joy or pleasure, let alone meaning. Suffering is life, so it’s something to be celebrated and embraced and revelled in as the heart and pulse and beauty of the world rather than a blight or an imbalance. Suffering (the escape from) is not the reason one should seek enlightenment. Annihilation of self on an absolute scale, is just the natural unfolding of one’s consciousness as one understands the nature of reality. I choose not to escape, but to embrace and cherish. Not to try to help others achieve understanding because I pity them, but rather because I adore them and I’d rather we all have FUN TOGETHER. True compassion is entirely unselfish. It’s very important for me to cultivate my love for this world no matter how I feel about any particular thing in it, I have an endless fountain of love within my heart and I can put so much energy into the world if I make the effort. Instinctually, I recoil from much of the world. I find things painful and ugly at times. I feel bitter, critical. I judge cynically and spitefully once in a blue moon. But I force myself to stop that response as soon it arises, dissipate it and dismiss it. It’s a socially constructed response. It’s sad and the more I fight, the more I see how false and contrived it is anyway.

When my heart is too quiet, sometimes the sounds that usually comfort me make me feel very alone. Absolute silence is all that I think I can tolerate, but the silence splits me open into a trifurcated crystal and blood seeps into my lachrymal glands while tears saturate my pericardium.

You cannot just get from struggle to freedom. To get to freedom you need struggle to go hand in hand with adaptation and actually achieve freedom. I struggle against society and dilute-decline-culture; but I do not pose myself as its outside – facing it antagonistically.

In my opinion, the world nowadays does not conform to the novel ways concocted by the new generation; rather, they stick to their own traditional conservationist views and do not accept anyone benignly. I think that this trend of our elders (old generation) is prevailing as a norm in this era, and they ought not impose such critical practices on the novel youth of today. More and more teenagers and young adults are becoming prone to the sticky rules of our elders. The world’s new outlook consists of various paraphernalia concerned with the youth. I am against such practices.

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Comments
  1. ddjfjfj says:

    Hi,
    Greeting.I think you are not a believer.you are seeker of truth.i suggest u one thing that might help u in this process to knowing absolute reality.u should read all sect of indian philosophy.
    Mine favourite philosophy are sankhya,yoga,vedanta and nagarjuna’s sunyata theory.
    Thanks

    Like

    • zej96 says:

      Haha, I am a philosopher myself. I am a believer, believer of my Creator guarding over me from the horizons of the sky! đŸ™‚
      However, thanks for commenting.

      Like

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